Transcend helps LGBTQ community find direction

By Kelly Terpstra, kterpstra@charlescitypress.com

Acceptance and being who you want to be.

That’s what Transcend is here for.

Jessamy Orcutt knew she needed to create a support system when her son, Booker Murray, came out as transgender three years ago.

“We’ve seen just this need. We weren’t even aware of how much this was needed in this area,” said Orcutt.

So Orcutt, along with Booker’s dad, Allen Murray, started Transcend Inc. in January 2017 in Charles City.

The non-profit organization helps foster relationships and understanding within the LGBTQ (lesbian, gay, bi-sexual, transgender and queer/questioning) community.

Transcend also gets its message across through meetings and training sessions to help inform and educate those who may not understand what LGBTQ is or how to address someone who identifies as gay or transgender.

“We have a lot of LGBTQ advocacy organizations, but nothing that really focuses on creating a community,” said Orcutt, Transcend’s executive director.

Only four people, Jessamy, Allen, Booker and an aunt in the family, showed up for that first Transcend meeting almost two years ago at the Charles City Public Library. Now about 50 members show up at three different localities in Charles City, Mason City and Waterloo.

Orcutt said she is also looking to expand even more into northwest Iowa, and into the Des Moines and Cedar Rapids areas. She said people come from Greene, Osage and even Minnesota to attend the meetings.

She is hoping to soon partner with Mercy Health Center-North Iowa in Mason City as well for some training sessions.

“We are just trying to get people involved and try to help them take ownership of the organization because it is theirs,” said Orcutt. “The whole community, it’s really coming together as a cohesive whole.”

Charles City Mayor Dean Andrews — with Jessamy, Allen and Booker present — proclaimed a Transgender Day of Remembrance at the last regular City Council session on Monday, Nov. 19.

The proclamation honored those transgender individuals whose lives were cut short due to violence because of who they were. The proclamation also hoped that the remembrance help pave the way for acceptance, inclusion and safety for transgender people.

“That was huge,” Orcutt said. “I don’t think anybody understands what that means to a transgender person, whether they’re from Charles City or not. Because Charles City is a small town and people from other small towns are going to see that and go, ‘Wow – there’s hope.’”

The difficulties of not being “the norm” or feeling that your birth sex does not equate to how you feel and how you perceive yourself was something that Booker needed to address early in his life.

He said he came out as LGBTQ when he was 11. Two years later he identified as gender fluid, a gender recognition that identifies with both male and female traits or characteristics.

Then there was the letter to his mother and father.

“So I came out to my parents in a letter,” said Booker. “I made him drive back out to our house so he could read it. He’s like, ‘You could have called and told me this.’”

Booker, now 19 and a student at the Carrie Lane Alternative High School in Charles City, remembers people asking his friends “who is that boy with you?” or getting called “sir” a lot before he transitioned to a male.

“That just really fit. That’s who I was supposed to be,” said Booker. “People were supposed to see me as a boy.”

Once Booker came out, it was time for a name change. He sat down with his mom and they finally came up with the name, Booker.

His previous name doesn’t exist anymore, he said.

“My dead name — I just couldn’t be that person,” said Booker. “For me that person no longer exists, but that person has also made me who I am today.”

Booker receives hormone treatments after going to the Mayo Clinic in Rochester to see a gender therapist. He’s been administering the hormones by himself for more than two years now.

He said he’s thankful his parents are supportive of him and for starting Transcend, where he can connect with other LGBTQ people like himself.  

“My parents have always supported me, as long as I’m not hurting myself or others. They still love me through and through,” said Booker.

Orcutt said Charles City has for the most part been accepting of her organization.

“Honestly, we have seen so much support here that it’s kind of overwhelming,” said Orcutt.

She said there is still resistance sometimes.

“The biggest issue we see around here is people using religion as a front for their discrimination,” said Orcutt. “When people come at us with hatred or with discrimination or prejudice, it’s usually conjoined with some religious aspect. They’ll say ‘God doesn’t want people transgender’ or ‘that’s not how it’s supposed to be based on the Bible.’”

That’s something that her newest family member, 18-year-old Hayes Murray, knows all too well.

The taunting at his former school, the name-calling and the mental anguish that he incurred at times was almost too much for him to bear, he said.

Hayes and his family did not see eye-to-eye. There was an argument one night and he was kicked out of his house at 17.

“It’s kind of like back and forth. I want to have that relationship, but I also don’t want to risk my mental health for that relationship,” Hayes said.

Orcutt saw a loving and caring individual who just needed some guidance and somebody who understood his frustration and pain.

“Hayes came to one of our very first Charles City meetings. He was questioning his gender identity. He wasn’t really sure where he fit,” said Orcutt.

So Orcutt and Booker took him in.

“I call him my adopted son,” Orcutt said.

Hayes was able to get the information, love and support he so desperately craved through Transcend.

“They’re able to cement that identity,” said Orcutt, who helped Hayes legally change his name once he turned 18.

Transcend will hold an LGBTQ Game Night at the First Congregational United Church of Christ in Mason City at 4 p.m. Saturday. There will also be a joint Thanksgiving/Christmas celebration at First Congregational UCC in Mason City at 4 p.m. Saturday, Dec. 8.

On Dec. 15, Transcend will throw another holiday combo get-together at the Cedar Valley Unitarian Universalists in Cedar Falls. There will also be a support group meeting at 5 p.m. Saturday, Dec. 22, at the Charles City Public Library.

Transcend has also joined with the library to announce a community reading of “I Am Jazz,” a children’s book that talks about Jazz Jennings’ experience as a transgender girl. Transcend will be the storytime guests on that date, scheduled 2 to 3 p.m. Saturday, Feb. 16.

Transcend also runs a Clothing Closet, where people can drop off clothing donations. The clothes are then given to people to help with their transition.

Allen, who is president of Transcend and is also the director of Floyd County Search and Rescue, talked about the mission of Transcend broken down into simpler terms.

“Every journey is different. It’s getting people to understand that the core of everybody is just being human. Everything else is just labels,” he said.