Woman’s vow of celibacy is tested by her friends

adviCe

Woman’s vow of celibacy is tested by her friends

DEAR ABBY: I am a

28-year-old woman who has

decided, after 11 years and

50-plus partners, to become celibate. A couple of friends

have attempted to get me to

break my vow. These men

know how they make me feel,

and I am finding it difficult to

stay away from them. Although I have stopped spending time with them, I still feel the urge to be with them.

So, do you have any advice on how to stay strong? It’s

been one month, and I plan

on staying this way until I get married.

– TRYING TO STAY

CELIBATE

DEAR TRYING: Old habits are hard to break, but as you already know, it can be done. An effective way to do that

is to replace the habit you're

trying to change with some other activity. Right now, it’s

important for you stay busy.

Consider increasing the

amount of exercise you do each day, doing projects around

your home, filling your time by volunteering, etc. If you do,

you’ll have less time to dwell on what you’re “missing.” This is not to say that your sex drive will go away, but it will help you to better control it.

*** DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend's son, "Matt," just turned 21, but he looks 16. He has just announced that he’s moving in with a 50-year-old woman – the mother of a

friend of his.

I feel very uncomfortable about the idea of welcoming

her into my home and making conversation as if they are a normal couple. His father and I are the woman’s age. I

don't believe Matt has told his mom or his siblings yet. He's

quickly losing friends over this awkward situation.

I’m usually of the mindset to "live and let live," but here I

am tested. It feels creepy. What is the proper way to handle this?

– UNEASY IN

CALIFORNIA

DEAR UNEASY: Handle this by withholding judgment

and waiting to see how the romance plays out. Matt may

look 16, but at 21 he's an adult and capable of making his own decisions about his love life without “help” from his father’s girlfriend. Matt’s lady friend may be a very young 50 and Matt may be a mature 21. Having met neither of them, I can’t judge. And neither should you, so stay out of the line of fire, or the romance that suffers may be your own.

Dear Abby

abigail van buren